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Astros @ A’s Series Preview

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ASTROS @ ATHLETICS

Apr 14-16 2017

I spent a few months in Oakland a few years ago, and I genuinely enjoy the town.  Sure, our courthouse got shot at overnight (the judge discovered her office windows were NOT bulletproof when she found a bullet lodged in her microwave).  Sure, the city smells like San Francisco farted.  And sure, a skinny white flower girl ran up and punched me on my way to work because I needed to “watch my skin.”  But this is all background noise when you consider the city’s great beer bars, great burger joints and a great baseball culture.

There’s a neat little hipster clothes store along Broadway Ave that sells t shirts with ironic slogans and those essential floppy stocking caps that Legolas seems to sponsor.  I bought a shirt with a picture of a bus on it.  I’m not really sure why.

The A’s were doing their bi-monthly “we gonna leave, give more moneyz” thing while I was there, and the neat little hipster clothes store had their seasonal collection of “stAy” memorabilia hanging in the windows.  One sunny Saturday they had a special guest that created a line out the door: Josh Fucking Reddick.

Now, as a distinguished beardsman, I both applaud and abhor this look.  I love the idea of just never shaving ever again, but at some point you cross the Harry and the Henderson’s line.  Nobody thinks that looks good.

And as I passed the neat little hipster clothes store on this sunny Saturday, I peeked inside and caught a Mentos-style freeze frame of the famous baseball sasquatch high-fiving a beer-bellied patron and thought – I love this guy.  The city loves this guy.  I wish he was on my team.

WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED ON THE WAY TO HOUSTON?!?

 

THE SERIES

I’m currently living Craig’s daily nightmare in Arkansas, so the only baseball I get on TV is Cardinals and Rangers and Cubs.  As such, I have not seen a single inning of Astros baseball this year.  So my analysis, such as it is, is based on stats, the GZ and my imagination.

 

FRIDAY, 9PM CST ROOT

Keuchel (1-0, 0.64 era) v Graveman (2-0, 2.08 era)

Battle of the Aces.

 

SATURDAY, 3PM CST ROOT

McCullers, Jr (1-0, 2.77 era) v Maneanaena (0-1, 7.15 era)

Each starting pitcher’s last name begins with an M.  Also Jackie Robinson day.

 

SUNDAY, 3PM CST ROOT

Morton (0-1, 4.09 era) v Cotton (1-1, 3.97 era)

That kinda rhymes.

 

PROMOTIONS

Not a damn thing.  Come to the ballpark to watch baseball, you damn hippies, not for some shiny handout.

 

INJURIES

 

OAKLAND

John Axford – Head

Chris Bassitt – Shoulders

Sonny Gray – Knees

Daniel Mengden – Toes

Jake Smolinski – Knees

Joe Wendle – Toes

 

HOUSTON

McHugh – Right elbow, out at least six weeks

Paulino – Right elbow, out for awhile

 

Follow the series on the GZ!


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